Meet Our Neighbors. We Can Trust Them With Coronavirus. Seriously.

Ladies & Gentlemen of Fargo, West Fargo, Cass County and state of North Dakota:

Allow me to introduce you to your neighbor, Larry. That’s him in the center, along with his brother, Darryl (left), and his other brother, Darryl (right).

These gentlemen will be in charge of your health and safety through the duration of the COVID-19 pandemic, by NONORDER #1 from N.D. Gov. Doug Burgum, the Cass County Commission, West Fargo City Commission President Bernie Dardis and Fargo Mayor Tim Mahoney.

The governor, commissioners and mayor are quite confident in their commitment to “personal responsibility.” In fact, they’re “in lockstep” in their conviction. They said so several times in their press conference today. (Burgum wasn’t there, unfortunately; he was attending to other coronavirus / COVID-19 NONORDERS.)

Nevertheless, you can be secure in the notion that your neighbor, Larry, and his brothers, Darryl and Darryl, will take the highly infectious nature of this deadly virus and their commitment to voluntary social distancing seriously and stay at home to slow its spread.

There’s no enforcement based on NONORDER #1 unless police see a gathering of 10 or more people. Yeah, it only takes ONE infected person who doesn’t know they’re infected to infect an entire village (or city), but, hey, we’re feeling really good about this. Because, you know, our neighbors are all super-smart and crazy careful.

We can trust these guys. Seriously.

What’s that? The people who you’ve already seen ignoring the governor’s directives for weeks? Never mind them. This local restatement of the state directives and repackaging of them as “Stay Home. | Save Lives.” is guaranteed to solve that problem.

Guaranteed.

Larry, Darryl and Darryl.

When it comes to coronavirus and COVID-19, trust them.

Seriously.

 

* Barry Kemp and Sheldon Bull created the characters Larry, Darryl and Darryl for the hit CBS comedy “Newhart.”

Like this satirical post? How about tossing some change IV Words’ way, a.k.a., “buy us a cup of coffee”? If nothing else, please scroll down, leave your comments and sign up to receive more IV Words in your inbox. Thanks!

Featured image: CBS/Courtesy Everett Collection


Martin C. Fredricks IV

Martin C. “Red” Fredricks IV here. I’m husband to an amazing woman who is also my best friend, dad to three outstanding kids, Fargoan (North Dakota, that is), proud introvert, veteran messaging strategist/copywriter, and big-time reader. As they say, if you're gonna write good stuff, you have to read good stuff. A ginger, too - ergo the "Red" - although some of it's going white. Cinnamon-Sugar, I call it. Tattooed to boot; seven so far. At age 54, I'm stilling crankin' AC/DC & Metallica, but now and again I spin some Eric Church and Black Uhuru, too. I love hanging out with my (much) better half, spending time with our kids, writing, hiking, riding my mountain bike and reading.

2 Comments

Welcome to North Dakota, a Longstanding Covidiocracy - IV Words - The Progressive Perspe · January 18, 2021 at 4:11 pm

[…] to implement a statewide mask mandate for months… consistently and continuously insisting our Larry, Darryl and Darryl neighbors would be responsible and do the right thing (nope)… ND became tops in the nation for infection rates… Burgum […]

Fargo Brothers Receive North Dakota “Good COVID Neighbor Award” - · April 29, 2020 at 3:51 pm

[…] three weeks after Fargo, N.D., Mayor Tim Mahoney introduced three brothers as the city’s model neighbors for responsible social distancing, North Dakota’s governor has presented them with the state’s first-ever Good COVID Neighbor […]

Let me know what you think!

Never Miss a Post!

Sign up today to get new IV Words right in your inbox. Unsubscribe anytime.

%d bloggers like this: